Update on Killstream 3
The current state of my fiction factory.
Let me start with some honest news: Killstream 3 will not be releasing in April.
But something else will.
Maybe.
Okay, let me elaborate.
Killstream? More like, I’m tired and don’t know what I’m doing
So, Killstream. It’s fun. It’s a cool series, and I think the concept is awesome.
I wrote the first book more for myself than anything else. It was a unique idea I hadn’t seen done in this way before, and it turned out really well. I had a blast writing it and found myself excited to sit down every day and work on it.
Then I wrote the prequel novella, and that was also super fun. I enjoyed getting to explore Keiko and her world, and I loved seeing The Arena and the Metaverse from someone else’s perspective.
Momentum, the second novel in the series, was also fun. It might not have turned out as good as the first book, but what sequel does? (Just forget that The Empire Strikes Back, Tron: Legacy, and Speaker For The Dead exist for a moment.) It could have been better, but I’m satisfied in knowing that I did my best, it’s a fun story, and I learned a lot from the experience.
But some of the feedback was… less than stellar.
It wasn’t all negative. Most of the readers enjoyed it. It wasn’t as good as The Arena, but it was still a fun adventure and a good installment in the series, leading into the final book in the first arc.
But a couple of readers were not happy with how it turned out.
They let me down easy. They were kind and respectful, but they definitely did not like Momentum. That’s okay. Not every story is going to be for everyone, and I’m very grateful for their honesty. With their help, the series will only get better.
But for whatever reason, in the back of my mind, a fear gripped me. Fear that, with every new book in the Killstream series, the stories would get worse and worse. A fear that the third book would be horrible. A fear that I needed to make it perfect and make everyone like it.
This is obviously bologna, but it’s a fear that every artist has at one point or another. The fear of criticism and rejection.
Unfortunately, I let that fear take me over. I began writing Killstream 3 with those fears in mind. I was constantly thinking about what I could do to make those critics happy with the third installment. I thought about what they said about both Killstream 1 and 2, and I tried to make adjustments for them in 3.
That’s not how art is made.
How can one be creative and afraid? How can one be spontaneous yet constrained? How can one release one’s imagination while holding back?
The truth is that I forgot why I started writing Killstream in the first place. I started this series because it’s something I believe in. It’s the book series I wanted to read as a kid. It came from my love of Tron: Legacy, and I wanted to capture the feelings that movie stirred in me in my own work. With the first book, I succeeded. The second one, I began to see the series as work more so than a creative project.
The third? I lost it.
40,000 words in, and I had no idea where to go. Well, that’s not true. I knew where to go, but I didn’t want to. What if that’s not what people want? What if people don’t like it? What if it’s worse than Momentum?
The manuscript was a disjointed mess of multiple ideas clashing for attention. I didn’t even know what the story was about. But I kept writing anyway because I felt like I had to.
I didn’t.
So, Killstream 3 will be coming later because I’m scrapping the current draft and starting from square one.
This is something I’ve never done with a feature-length project before, and it’s both relieving and scary at the same time. Relieving in that I don’t have to worry about trying to take something bad and slowly, painstakingly mold it into something good, and scary because that’s so much work, time, and energy that I’m just shoving aside. What if all of that wasted time catches up, and a professional writing career is that much further away because I messed up?
But I’m not comfortable with publishing Killstream 3 as it is. I had a plan for this book before writing the first novel, but at this point, with how many changes I’ve made, I don’t know what it’s about anymore. I don’t know what the series is about anymore. I’ve completely lost the plot.
But I’m not done with Killstream.
This is my dream series. The books that I’ve been waiting to see on a shelf ever since I saw Sam Flynn step onto the Grid for the first time. I’m not just going to put that aside because I had a bad month.
I’m going back to the roots of Killstream. I’m going through Tron and reminding myself what made it so special to me. I’m going through my old notes, my old drafts, and the first book of the series. Where was my head at when I was so much more excited about this series, and how do I get that spark back?
But before I do any of that, I need to step away from the project for a little while. I need to take a break, take a breath, and get my mind off things.
Stepping away for a little while
For me, stepping away usually means not writing altogether. No drafting, no brainstorming, and no trying to figure things out. Just setting everything aside and letting the peace of God set in.
While I will be letting the peace of God into my mind, I will not be standing still this time.
First of all, I have quotas for myself, so there’s that. Second, if I don’t work on something else, I’m gonna have Killstream on the brain throughout this whole thing while I unconsciously try to figure it out.
So, what will I be working on?
That’s a very good question.
I’ve had several project ideas I’ve wanted to explore for a long time now. One of them requires a lot of research, so that’s on the back burner for now. The other three are interesting, but I’m having a hard time deciding which one would be best to work on because they’re all so cool.
So, I need your help.
You’re darn right! You—yes, you—get to choose my next project!
The closest thing I’ve done to something like this before is letting you guys help out with book covers, which I absolutely love doing.
But I’ve never asked you guys to vote on the next book. That’s a new thing. I’m really excited.
So, here are the options:
The first is a space western that follows a robot sheriff as he travels the galaxy to enforce law and order. But sometimes, the concept of “justice” goes beyond simple programming.
The next is a space fantasy in line with stories like A Princess Of Mars and Star Wars. It follows a young monk as he searches the stars for the One, spreading peace and helping out where he can. But peace isn’t always an easy thing to achieve.
The last one is a little more vague, but the concept and imagery have been in my mind for years. It’s a bigger space opera project that adapts Norse mythology into a sci-fi setting. It will be less goofy than the Marvel portrayal and will be given a much larger scale. Multiple POVs, multiple worlds, and big adventure and mysteries. I’m kind of leaning away from this one in this instance since this might end up being such a massive project, but it’s an idea I think could be super interesting.
So, what’ll it be? Western, fantasy, or mythology?
You’ve got three days to vote. Make it count!
Thank you so much for reading and supporting me through this journey. Despite the bumpy road I’m on right now, I know this is going to continue to be a great year for my writing. I love how things have gone so far, and I cannot wait to continue writing for you and giving you stories that you enjoy.
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I didn’t vote for it, but I’ll be looking out for your Norse mythology space book! I love Norse mythology.
You got this! Write the story you want to write, and more importantly the story God wants you to write. The right readers will get it, but you can't try to write for everyone. 👍🏻