Un-Optimizing Life
Why I don’t want to live an “ideal” life.
Howdy.
I’m praying I finish this post on time, but I’m not sure I’ll be able to make it.
Life’s been very busy lately. Lot’s of things are happening, and it’s been a lot of fun. I’ve been writing a lot, I’m volunteering for a camp, and I’m going to a writer’s conference.
Although, according to some, this is exactly what I shouldn’t be doing.
An optimal life
See, I’m not supposed to be writing. I’m supposed to be using the money I’m getting from work and investing it into college so I can graduate, get my degree in something that sounds smart, find a high-paying job (preferably with salary), settle down, get married, have kids, then keep on doing the same job every day, over and over again for 40 years until I retire, and then I’m too old to do anything.
Now, there’s nothing technically wrong with this plan, and a lot of people find peace in it.
However…
I’ve dropped out of college. A while ago.
I don’t want to be in school. Not right now, anyways. Will I go back to school? Maybe. I’m not sure. But right now, I want to focus on what I really enjoy and—I believe—I’m good at.
Writing stories.
An un-optimal life
I love doing things for other people. That might be something small like holding the door open for someone, it might be writing a book that someone’s been looking for and no one has written yet (like, for instance, a sci-fi adaptation of Norse mythology), or it might be giving up a week to minister to students at a camp.
But here’s the thing.
I don’t get paid to do anything of those things.
(Well, technically, I get money from my books, but it’s not significant money yet.)
Some people see that as a problem. If I’m not making money, then what the heck am I doing it for? Surely, I’m not wasting my time having fun while I’m in my youth when I should be building my financial foundation to live comfortably for the rest of my life, right?
Kinda, yeah.
And that’s exactly the thing: I don’t want to live a comfortable life. I want to live a full life, and life feels fullest when I’m creating.
Some of you might know, I’m a bit of a gamer. I don’t exactly have hours and hours to play every day. Heck, I’ve barely played at all over the last couple of weeks.
My point is that, in video games, you want to take the optimal route. You choose abilities, weapons, and strategies that give you the biggest advantage possible to make things easier for you.
But when I play games like that, I get overwhelmed and frustrated. Fun stops being the point, and I start looking up tutorials and finding the best builds that other people have already made so I can make it for myself. I might think the optimal armor is super ugly, but if that’s the set I’m supposed to use, then I’ll use it.
But these are games. Some people find that kind of playing fun, but I don’t.
I want to wander around and explore. I want to wear the funniest looking armor I can find. I want to relax and enjoy the world or story someone put so much time and effort into and others treat as a backdrop for their numbers.
I take my time in games. Sometimes, I take a little too long. But I enjoy exploring the different cracks and corners in each level, looking for secrets. Often, when I see where I’m obviously supposed to go, I go the opposite way. I want to see the whole map.
The truth is that I kinda want to live my life like that, too. I don’t want to take the optimal route. I want to tell stories for a living, and I want to travel while I do. Eventually, I want to marry and have kids. But I don’t want to be working a job for someone else and miss them growing up. I want to watch them every step of the way.
That’s why writing is so important to me. It allows me to meander. To explore. To just be God’s creation.
And maybe one day, if it’s the Lord’s will, this will become my job, and I’ll be able to travel more, enjoy more, and learn more.
So, no. I’m not in college. I don’t plan to be in the immediate future. I plan to be working, writing, and enjoying life, serving others where I can and learning as much as I can about the world God gave us.
I urge you to do something similar. It might not look exactly the same, but that’s fine.
Don’t live optimally. You only get one life. Why not spend it doing things you love? Why not live to the fullest? Jesus gave us exact instructions on how to do just that. Remember that your heavenly Father will provide for you just as He provides for the birds and the flowers.
Un-optimize your life. Waste some time, and enjoy doing it.
Thanks for reading. I hope you enjoyed this article. For more like it and exclusive fiction coming very, very soon, subscribe and have everything sent directly to your inbox.
You can read one of my several books available on Amazon. They’re all family-friendly and all super fun.
If you like what I do and want to support it, please visit my Buy Me A Coffee page or simply share this post with a friend who needs it.
This post was such a God send! I was just out with a friend, my mom, and my sister, and we were talking about my future. What do I want to do? Do I go to college? Stuff like that. I honestly love to teach. I love helping people, and teaching them things I’ve learned and helping others grow. Our friend said to me, where there’s a will there’s a way. If you follow your interests, God will lead you where you need to be. He gave you those talents and interests that you love. He wants you to be happy as you walk this journey.
Your post (which I just read after I got back from my visit) was just an assurance for me to pursue my dreams. God bless you, and I hope that whatever God is planning in your life that it will all come together. You will be in my constant prayers.
P. S. Yes! I love exploring when in a game! It’s so much fun.
>I take my time in games. Sometimes, I take a little too long. But I enjoy exploring the different cracks and corners in each level, looking for secrets.
Preach. The 110 hours I've clocked in Hollow Knight is none of your business. That's between me and my Steam account. Excuse me for wanting to take my time exploring a metroidvania game, a game literally designed for exploration, instead of wanting to speedrun the entire game in 30 mins 😭
Hollow Knight has taught me a lot about life. Namely, that if you see something shiny, there is rarely a shortcut and you're gonna have to go the long way, fight gauntlets of enemies, die multiple times, learn combat patterns, and just generally explore every breakable wall before you defeat that final miniboss and EARN that shortcut.
I've found that God wants me to live life the metroidvania way — take my time, explore what he's given me, learn to fight, learn to get back up after defeat, and no free shortcuts to anything!! If I see something shiny, God is gonna make sure he leads me the long way, so that when the time comes to receive the blessing, I've grown into the type of person who's able to steward it well!